One of the greatest benefits of blogging is getting emails and comments from readers. It’s extremely encouraging and I’m so grateful for everyone who takes time out of their day to read this blog. It’s also really cool when I receive an email from readers in other countries.

I don’t usually share the emails on the blog for a number of reasons. Often, the note is personal in nature or the reader didn’t feel like having it broadcast to the world. I respect that. Today, I received the email below from a reader in Saudi Arabia (how cool is that?!) and was so encouraged and inspired by it that I had to share it along with my response. I’ve left the sender’s name out in case he/she doesn’t want to be named publicly.

The advice is really about how to win in business. It doesn’t matter what path you’re on, I believe these principles apply to everyone.

If you have any additional advice that you would like to add to it, please share in the comments below! I’d love to hear what you would have responded with.

Dear Travis,

I Hope this email finds you well.

My Name is [redacted], Egyptian living and working in Saudi Arabia. I’m a huge fan of your “career path” and I would love to take the same pass, Although, the resources where I live are very limited. I currently work as a Digital Media Manager in a multi-national company and I’m also a PHP developer.

I have some key questions and I believe you have the right answers. My question is how to be like you, to have the same career path, where should I start? What should I study? What are the keys that would allow me to be a good successful business developer and be able to set good business strategies? I actually have so many questions but those are enough for one email

Thank you very much for you time,
Best Regards,

[Redacted]

Hi [Redacted],

First, I want to sincerely thank you very much for your email. It was very special and I am very grateful that you sent it to me.

Second, I think it’s awesome that you want to head down the path of being a business strategist and business developer! It’s an exciting path and, if you really enjoy it, you’ll figure out the best way to make it work for you. While I’m not very familiar with your culture and business climate, I will try to offer you some advice that I believe transcends geography and culture. I hope this helps to get you started on the right path.

Business is all about relationships – we conduct business with people we trust and like. Become the type of person who people trust and people like. That’s the very first step. After that, everything you do should be about helping other people and helping businesses grow. If you have family or friends who are in business, offer to help them find ways of improving their business. At first, you may need to offer them an introductory rate for your services. That’s okay. Ask them if they would be willing to give you a testimonial that you can use on your website as well as refer you to others who may need your services.

Tell people what you are doing and how you can help them. Attend events in your area. When people ask you what you do, don’t tell them that you’re a business developer. Instead, tell them that you help your clients grow amazing businesses (or something similar). Their natural response will be to want to know more and they will invite you to explain your statement. That’s when you can communicate how you do it and tell them more about what you do.

If you are interested in going to school, enroll in business courses. However, I think you can learn a lot more from reading business books. There are some great authors and that is where I learn more than anything else. If you’re interested in which books I recommend, visit this link: http://travisrobertson.com/book-shelf. It has a list of many of the books I’ve read and I continue to update it with more all the time.

I believe this is far more valuable than a university education. However, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t pursue an education at university. It simply means that your education should not stop once you leave university. You should always be learning and growing. The truth is that I have learned more from the books that I have read than all of my schooling combined.

Much of what I’ve learned about business, I’ve also learned through experience. I study successful businesses to see what makes them successful. I study unsuccessful businesses to understand what makes them unsuccessful. I’ve also worked for both types of businesses and took on leadership roles wherever I could.

I also recommend that you consider sharing your thoughts and ideas on a blog. It’s a great way to demonstrate your understanding of various topics and build credibility within your community. Your clients want to know that you have the ability to understand their needs and provide them with the best ideas and suggestions for their business.

Blogging is a form of teaching. It will help you form your thoughts and ideas more clearly. I always learn more when I have to teach something than when I simply learn for understanding or information. Teaching forces your brain to simplify, synthesize and clarify concepts and information. Blogging is just one of the ways to do this. You could also teach classes and speak at local groups and events.

The final suggestion I would make is to learn to listen for people’s real needs. Often, people and businesses you are working with either don’t understand what they really need or they don’t know how to ask for it. In order to be successful at helping others, you need to be a keen observer and develop the ability to hear the question that isn’t asked. Listen to what people are saying, but also try to “hear” what isn’t being said. This is a skill, but the person who masters it will set themselves apart from others.

I have no doubt that you will be successful on this path. Please let me know if I can help you in any other way.

Sincerely,
Travis

Share Your Advice

What advice would you give this reader? I’d love to have you share it in the comments below.

Below are a list of articles I found interesting this week. If you’ve found some interesting stuff, please share it in the comments below!

Why Did 17 Million Students Go To College? – An interesting look at the number behind college and the value we’re really getting from our educations. It begs the question, “Is college really worth it?”

How to Hire and Work With a Virtual Assistant – One of the guys in my entrepreneur group shared this with us. The next 12 months will find me looking to use a virtual assistant for certain work in my business. When I do, I will be turning to this article. If you’re swamped, but not sure it’s time to hire a full-time employee, consider a VA first and read this article.

The Persuasive Power of Swearing – “Light swearing at the start or end of a persuasive speech can help influence an audience.” Now, I’m not advocating this methodology for increasing persuasion. In fact, I recommend you don’t swear. However, there’s an interesting nugget that points out that it may not be the swearing that persuades people as much as it is the perceived passion for your content that’s the persuasive element. People resonate with passion. Swearing is just one way of communicating passion – not the only and certainly not the best.

Burnout S.O.S.: Increase Your ‘Worth Ethic’ and Save Your Health – Feeling burned out? This post examines how understanding where we derive our sense of “worth” affects our sense of well-being. Noticeably missing from the piece is how faith fits into the picture. But it’s from the Huffington Post, so that shouldn’t surprise anyone. Still a good read.

Setting Up a Social Media Management Center – A fairly comprehensive post from social media expert Chris Brogan. Some of the tools he recommends are quite expensive and there are inexpensive and free alternatives to a lot of them. But it gives anyone an understanding of what needs to be done to create a strong social media presence and manage it effectively.

How to Setup Your First Blog the Right Way the First Time – Not sure this needs much explanation. I know a lot of my readers are working on setting up a blog or are thinking about it so check this out.

EntreLeadership 1-Day – I went to this yesterday with Justin Davis of Madera Labs and it’s a fantastic event well worth the small investment. I’ve been to both the live 1-Day and the Simulcast. Both are spectacular but go to the live event if you ever get the chance. This is not an affiliate link, by the way. That’s how much I believe in this type of material.

Photo courtesy of celinesphotographer

I’ve had an insanely busy week. As a result, I’ve completely dropped the ball on writing a blog post this week. When I sat down to write, I was reminded of a question I heard recently.

The question?

What would you do in your life if you were absolutely confident that you would succeed?

And then it hit me. This is a great opportunity to try an idea I’ve had for a while – an open discussion. I spend a lot of time on this blog expounding on ideas. That makes sense since it’s my blog.

But what I really love is the dialogue and the conversation with you. So I want us to try an open discussion in the comments around a single question. It could bomb since it’s possible nobody will respond, but who cares? I also don’t know how often we’ll do these. However, this week seems like a great week to try it.

So, in the comment section at the bottom of this page, answer this question: What would you do in your life if you were absolutely confident that you would succeed? It could be anything. Just have at it – no restrictions.

To get the party kicked off, here’s my answer:

I would stop procrastinating on an e-book I’ve been working on and get it finished. I believe it can and will succeed, I’m just in the self-doubt phase of the project where I question everything about it. This is also why I have a team of fellow entrepreneurs I meet with on a weekly basis to hold my feet to the fire. I’ll no doubt hear about this on Monday.

What would you do?

Photo credit: Stuck In Customs

Warning: This post has only been mildly proofread. It’s my “gut reaction” to a few conversations on debt over the last two days. It’s not nearly as polished as many of my others. Don’t say you haven’t been warned.

This post has been rolling around in my head for a while. I didn’t plan on writing it yet – partially because it’s a sensitive topic and partially because it’s difficult to be thorough and brief. Not impossible, just difficult.

On Thursday, I was talking with my oldest friend when the topic of debt came up. I told him that I believe any business could be started and operated without debt. He disagreed and it started a fun and challenging dialogue about “responsible borrowing.”

That same evening, I was talking with my wife Lisa at dinner recounting the conversation when I said, “Debt is a tool of the impatient person.” We talked about that for a while and I stand by my statement. (She agreed with me, in case you’re wondering.)

Today, I tweeted that statement out and heard about “responsible debt” again from a business perspective along with it being an “effective” tool when used responsibly.

Finally, my friend Amber asked what Dave Ramsey would say about Kiva.org – the micro-lending site that allows ordinary people in wealthier nations to help those in third-world countries by loaning them small amounts to start businesses. I told her I didn’t know (which I don’t) – nor am I really concerned about it.

My stance on debt and finances, while certainly informed by Dave Ramsey, is my own. It’s been molded from my own experiences and background and it has evolved a lot over the years. I met him once for 30 seconds. Kiva never came up.

So let me try to tackle these points.

Is Debt Needed to Start a Business?

The short answer: no.

The long answer: no.

“But what about…” Look, I’ve heard a lot of these questions. One of the more common ones I get is about restaurants. Opening a restaurant takes a lot of money. The average is about $125,000. Most are likely financed. I have no statistics on this – it’s a conjecture, but I’d bet I’m right. Anywhere from 60-90% depending on your source will close in the first 5 years.

Here’s the deal: if you take out a loan to start a business, you will have to personally guarantee the loan. Which means, you will be borrowing against your family’s well-being and putting it at risk for a business. If your business goes under, creditors have rights to your personal assets. This is bad. Just ask anyone who’s gone through bankruptcy after borrowing to start their business.

Would You Borrow Money to Invest in the Stock Market?

If I came to you and asked if I would be wise to take a home equity line on my house at a rate of 7% to invest it in the stock market which historically returns 10% or more in the long-term, what would you say?

I hope you would tell me I’m an idiot.

Investing in the stock market is investing in businesses. When you buy shares of a company, you are investing in that business. So it is when you’re starting a business. You must invest capital to start a business. So, should you borrow money and leverage your personal assets to start a business?

I’d argue the answers are the same.

Debt is a Tool of the Impatient

There. I said it again. I still stand by it.

Let’s go back to our restaurant example. The argument makes a faulty assumption that the only way to open a restaurant is to open a restaurant in one step. To go from “I don’t own a business” to “I now own a fully operational restaurant” in 6 months. If you take that view, then you will need $125,000 over the next 6 months (if not more). There are only three ways to get $125,000 (legally):

1. Borrow the funds
2. Get investors
3. Save up the money

While I used to be, I’m no longer a fan of legal partnerships. I’d prefer to maintain 100% control. But how do you save up a $125,000? You bootstrap it.

Here’s an example of bootstrapping a restaurant:

1. Save up $10,000 while keeping your day job. At night, start building up a killer short menu. Test out your recipes on friends and family who will give honest feedback.
2. When you have some money saved up, offer to cater a friend’s wedding who’s looking to save money. Use your previously created menu as the starting point. Use your $10,000 (or whatever the actual number would be) to hire a few servers for the day – or recruit family.
3. If it’s well-received, start connecting with local party planners, party supply rental companies, etc. Tell them about your services and create joint ventures with them to refer business.
4. Save and invest back into the growth of the business but only grow as fast as you can manage without debt.
5. Live on less than you make. (Shocking, I know.) I’ve tried it the other way, it doesn’t work for long.
6. When you have some money saved up (let’s say $75,000-$100,000), try to find a failing restaurant in a good location. Structure a great buyout deal.
7. Invest as little of your money as you can to refurbish the restaurant and get it running. Invite EVERYONE you’ve ever catered for opening night.
8. Rinse and repeat.

Now, I’m not in the restaurant business. I’ve been a waiter before – and a pretty bad one at that. Obviously, there are steps missing in my sample plan. That’s not the point. The point is that is can be done. It just takes patience.

“But I don’t want to open a catering company.” That’s fine. You’re not patient. I get it. Go get a loan. Just don’t tell me it can’t be done.

So, how patient are you?

Bootstrapping is More for “Lifestyle Businesses”

Tell that to Cisco. The company is valued at $131 Billion (with a “B”). And, according to USA Today, the company has never had any debt since the inception of the company. Building a business debt-free is possible – regardless of the type of business.

My Thoughts on Kiva.org

Crap. This is going to tick some people off. Or a lot of people.

If you live your life by a set of principles, then you have to ask if those principles are black-and-white or if they’re guidelines. Things rarely fit neatly into a black-and-white world. After all, the world we live in is broken. But that’s a post for another day.

If you don’t know what Kiva is, it’s a micro-lending company where those in third-world companies are loaned money to get a small business started. The average is about USD $380. Not a lot to us, but a lot to them. You can pitch in as little as $25 toward their fundraising goal and the site a has a repayment rate of nearly 99% – an astounding figure.

Let me start by saying that my thoughts on Kiva are directed by this principle:

“The rich rules over the poor, and the borrower is slave to the lender.” Proverbs 22:7

Our faiths guide our worldview. So, if I look at this statement, what am I to believe? If I loan someone money, am I putting myself in the position of slave master? I’ve answered this for myself in the affirmative. Why? Because I’ve been on the other side and I was a slave to creditors and it nearly ruined me.

Separating the Mission of Kiva from the Method

I love what Kiva is trying to do. I’m a big supporter of their mission to end poverty. However, I have to ask myself if the method of putting people into debt is the right way or the best way to do this.

An interesting statistic that I’ve not been able to find on Kiva’s website is the success rate of businesses that have received money from Kiva loans. There is a difference between repaying a loan and running a successful business. They readily reveal the lending stats, but I’m not sure those are great measurement for success of any business other than their own (and the people loaning money).

The problems of poverty are huge and won’t be solved by this post. There are a lot of great organizations trying to fight it on different fronts. Many people have given money to Kiva. They are not bad people. The people running Kiva are not bad people. The people borrowing money from Kiva are not bad people. I’m merely calling into question the method.

I love the idea of helping people start small businesses in third-world countries. After all, I’m an unapologetic capitalist. But is the problem their lack of funding or is it a lack of education in basic financial principles?

Does the ability to repay a loan makes someone suddenly capable of making sound financial decisions?

Your Turn

Now that I’ve managed to anger a large segment of people, I’m going to stop and turn the blog over to you. The comment section is below. Have at it (or me). I will respond to everyone.

By the way, if you want to win 30 minutes on the phone with me to talk about goal setting or to yell at me for these viewpoints, read my post on How To Set Better Goals. You still have a little bit of time left.

Image credit: iandavid

Sorry I haven’t posted one of these in a while. It’s been busy around here preparing for my upcoming BarCamp sessions as well as some client projects I’m working on. Here are a list of articles I think you’ll find interesting. Maybe you’ve seen some of them; maybe you haven’t. Have a great weekend!

Living Self-Employed Online: The Manual They Forgot to Give You

15 Ways to Handle ‘Pick Your Brand’ Requests

Why Amish Businesses Thrive

Looking for Work by Chris Brogan

What Shape Is Your Funnel by Seth Godin

The Freakonomics Guide to Making Boring Content Sexy by Stanford Smith

What If?

Warning: 6 Signs Your Legacy Will End Up In A Trash Can

Photo Credit: mamiyaesdedia

Late last week, my wife Lisa came down with some cold/flu thing so we swung by our nearest Redbox to pick up a movie. What we ended up with is the ultra chick-flick “Letters to Juliet.” Other than being your typical, predictable film, it was cute.

Then something unexpected happened. Toward the end of the movie, one of the characters said something that knocked me upside the head:

“What” and “if” are two words as non-threatening as words can be. But, put them together side-by-side and they have the power to haunt you for the rest of your life.

If you want to create a life you’re proud of, build a legacy, and live a life with few regrets, you need to wrestle with the “What if” questions right now. Here’s a tip: read them as if you’re at the end of your life looking back. Then ask yourself what you can change in your life today. I’ve broken them into categories to make it easier to think about the different areas of your life.

Warning: You will ask these questions eventually. Better now than when it’s too late to do anything about them.

Career
What if you started that business you dreamed about for years?
What if you made your living doing something that made you feel alive?
What if money were no object? What would you do?
What if you could answer that question with, “I’m already doing it”?
What if your unemployment was really just an opportunity to try something new?
What if you didn’t accept that “this is how life works”?
What if you didn’t spend 2 weeks each year escaping from the work you do the other 50?
What if you found a job that combined your strengths and passions?
What if you spent less time in front of the TV?

Risk/Fear
What if you didn’t care what other people thought of you?
What if you acted in spite of your fear?
What if you said “Yes” when fear told you to say “No”?
What if you said “No” when fear told you to say “Yes”?
What if you didn’t quit?
What if you did quit?
What if you failed knowing that at least you tried?
What if you didn’t fail?
What if you didn’t learn from your failures?
What if they laughed at you?
What if they gave you a standing ovation?
What if you tried out for that team or applied for that position?
What if they say no?
What if they say yes?

Relationships/Family
What if you worked as hard on your marriage as you do in your job?
What if you spent more time with your kids and less time with your work?
What if you made the phrase “I love you” part of your daily life?
What if you called your parents more often?
What if you said, “I’m sorry”?
What if you said, “I forgive you”?
What if you said, “Thank you”?
What if you did something unexpected for someone you love, just because?
What if you did something for someone who couldn’t give you anything in return?
What if your memories were filled with more laughter than tears?
What if you cared as much about others as you do about yourself?

Health
What if you exercised just 20 minutes each day?
What if you quit smoking?
What if you lost weight?
What if you ate better?

Finances
What if you had no debt?
What if you spent less money?
What if you saved more money?
What if you gave more of your money?
What if you cut up your credit cards and consumed less?
What if you paid for things with only cash?
What if you didn’t measure your success by how much money you made or stuff you had?

Spirituality
What if you prayed more and worried less?
What if there is a God?
What if that God loves you?

Live Without Regrets

What if you could do it all over again?
What if these questions weren’t filled with regrets?

What if you got to the end of your life and never wondered, “What if?”

It’s better to ask, answer, and act on the “What if” questions now rather than wait until you’re older or until you’re told you have just a short time to live. We can’t go back and change what’s been done. But we can learn from the past and change how we move forward.

Don’t settle. Don’t accept status quo. Don’t wonder, “What if…?” It takes courage. But your family, your friends, the world, and your legacy are waiting on you to live with courage.

Photo courtesy of fadedmilkyway

It’s been a long time since I’ve done a video and I figured since I’m on vacation, I’d use this as an excuse to not hole up indoors on my computer.

If you’re interested in attending BarCamp Nashville and would like to participate in my sessions, use the links below:

Session #1
The Entrepreneurial UnPanel: 4 Hot Guys In Underwear Talk About Starting A Business

Session #2
The Millennial Revolution: Why Your Dad’s Management Manual Belongs in the Trash

Please help me spread the word about BarCamp Nashville and my sessions (unless you hate me because I’m on a boat … in a lake … drinking a beer right now)!

Please Like this on Facebook or RT on Twitter.

Share your thoughts

I haven’t done a video in a very long time. Did you like it? Should I do more videos? Do you think I suck at videos and should avoid being on camera ever again? Let me know below! Also, let me know if you’re planning to attend BarCamp Nashville so we can meet.

[Note to the grammar police: I know that the sign in the image should say "You're Fired." I don't care - I like the photo.]

One of the benefits that comes from writing about entrepreneurship is hearing from people who are making it happen. Some of the best stories are those where a person got laid off or fired and then, instead of going out and getting a J-O-B, they started their own business.

They usually have a twinkle in their eyes when they recount the story. They refer to a “weight being lifted” from their shoulders. They feel like they’ve “come alive.” Most say they make more money now then when they were back at their corporate gigs.

One of the most popular posts on this blog is from my friend Amber Khan who has one of those success stories.

Why Wait to be Fired?

Then I got to thinking. Why do so many people wait until they’re fired or laid off before they launch their own business? Why didn’t they quit that job they hated and fire their boss?

I know that fear is an obvious answer. But I think it’s more than that. Some people just don’t know how to quit. To them, quitting seems overwhelming because they’ve not taken the steps to be ready for it.

You Should Quit At Least Once in Your Life

Unless you’re one of those rare few who’ve never had a job (I’m looking at you, Chris Guillabeau), you’ve likely found yourself in some miserable position that sucks the life out you like a teenage vampire named Edward. Maybe you’re there right now.

I found myself there a few times. Too often though, I tried to stick it out. I rationalized that things would “get better when _______________.” Unfortunately, “when” never came.

The reality is that even if it did get better, it will never become great. You make the mistake that better than crappy is good enough since it’s an improvement. You settle.

Don’t ever settle. Why?

Quitting Can Make You Happier and Wealthier

This may surprise you, but unhappy people generally have less fun and make less money. Let that sink in.

Happiness and wealth don’t follow miserable people around begging for a chance to sulk with them. They actually don’t follow people around. Happiness and wealth have to be pursued.

It’s difficult to pursue happiness and wealth when you make a habit of settling for crappy positions that you hope will improve.

3 Steps to Firing Your Boss

So what do you need to do to fire your boss so that you can pursue something that fulfills you? Here’s a quick-start guide:

Step 1: Prepare

Prepare for the change in income. If you’re going to open that consultancy you’ve been dreaming about or start that home-based business, find ways to lay the groundwork before you quit.

When you’re laid off, you often don’t have this luxury. However, those who are gainfully (even if miserably) employed can do some initial prep-work before launching full time. Here are some recommendations to get you started:

Start the Business on Your Nights, Weekends and Lunch Breaks
Tell everyone you know (that can’t get you fired) what you’re doing. Get some initial clients and work out those startup kinks. This is a great way to test the waters and find out if you even like the work.

You’ll hear some people talk about trying to get their side business income to the level of their current position before they quit. While this is a fine goal, don’t be surprised if it proves to be more difficult than you planned. Time and energy are finite and certain businesses can only grow so large with part-time effort.

If you find that your nights, weekends, and lunch breaks have you to 40-50% of your salary, it may be time to quit. Ask yourself if you think a full-time focus on your business could get you up near (or above) 100% in a month or two.

Get Out of Debt and Build Up Your Savings

“Opening a business with debt is like trying to run a marathon with a loaded backpack on.” – Dave Ramsey

If you want to be successful at running your own business, you must learn to say “no” to yourself. Debt comes from saying “yes” too often. Climbing out of debt will give you the discipline you need to run a business on a budget.

Also, make sure you can survive through those lean months with a nice cushion built up in savings. Dave Ramsey recommends 3-6 months and I agree with him.

Step 2: Uncover Your Passion

Part of the reason we end up in positions we hate is because we chase money rather than pursue our passion. Money is important – but it’s not the only thing that should determine what you do with your life.

Use this foundation-laying time to discover what makes you come alive. What are your interests? Which activities do you participate in that cause time to fly at work?

There are great resources that can help you get started. I recommend the StrengthsFinder series along with Dan Miller’s book 48 Days to the Work You Love. They will get you thinking differently about your career path.

Step 3: Pull the Trigger (In a Non-Postal Way)

If you’ve taken the two steps above, you’re ready to pull the trigger. Here’s a tip: try not to burn bridges. I’ve watched people quit in over-the-top fashion just because they could.

Sure, it may make you an internet celebrity for a week, but remember that your reputation as a person of character is much more important. No matter how bad it was at the company, be gracious and look for win-win opportunities.

You’re about to leave them with a void in their team and this can be an opportunity for you. I was able to contract back to previous employers for varying lengths which helped smooth transitions for me financially.

Share Your Thoughts

If you’ve ever quit a job that sucked the life out of you, how did you feel after you made the decision? What tips would you offer to those who are thinking of doing the same?

If you’re stuck in a rut or a job you don’t love, what steps are you having the most difficulty with? Why are you staying put?

I’d love to get your thoughts below.

Photo credit: maisonbisson

“Hey, you’re the same age as Jesus was when he died!”

Yesterday was my 33rd birthday and the person who said that to me got me thinking about what turning “Jesus’ age” means.

No, there’s no mid-life crisis and I haven’t raced out to buy a convertible Corvette. But it’s sometimes good to think about what we’ve learned over the course of a lifetime.

I like to think about what I would tell myself if I could travel back in time to when I was in my early 20’s. Here are three lessons I would give myself.

Lesson #1: Bad Goals Are Always Disguised as Good Goals

If you set a goal for your life, you generally do so with the best of intentions. But good intentions don’t always lead to good goals. In fact, they can lead to just the opposite.

When I was in my early 20’s, I set a goal for myself that I would be a millionaire by 30. On the surface, this sounds like a good goal. After all, doing so would require me to work hard, make smart decisions with our money, live below our means, and to do all of the other things becoming a millionaire requires.

So what’s bad about this goal?

• It puts the emphasis on the wrong side of the equation. Because my focus was on the money, I ended up making bad decisions during that period of my life.
• I chose a career based on money rather than passion. I hated so much of my 20’s because I dreaded going to work each day. I was burning out very quickly.
• I became a workaholic. I spent too many years working 80+ hours each week. I neglected my wife Lisa, our family, and our friendships. As a result, I nearly lost my marriage.
• I didn’t take care of my health. By the time I was 26, my cholesterol was 351 (very bad), I was overweight, and I developed shingles due to stress. The final straw was when (at 31) I developed a severe case of vasculitis.

So how can you ensure that your goals are actually good for you? You evaluate the underlying assumptions.

I assumed that becoming a millionaire by 30 would make my life better than doing it by 35, 40 or even 50. Becoming a millionaire is a fine goal. However, the minute I put the “by 30” timeframe on it, I forced myself to make short-term sacrifices that would harm me in the long-run.

What good is being a 30-year-old millionaire if you’re overweight, burnt-out, and divorced?

If your goals require you to sacrifice things that you know are good for something you think might be good, it’s a bad goal.

Lesson #2: Life Moves Quickly, But This Isn’t a Race

When I was 6, Christmas took forever to roll around. A week was like a month. Now, I look up and it’s the end of August. It seems like just yesterday that I was freezing my butt off in January.

I know I sound like an old fart with this one, but I don’t care. It’s true. The more life advances, the more quickly it moves.

This can lead to the feeling that we need to hurry up: “Time is running out and I need to get a move on with my goals and my plans and my future. After all, look at the Jones’ over there – they already have 2.5 kids, a BMW, and a 5 bedroom house mortgage.”

The feeling like you’re in a race against time with your life is based on the assumption that certain things are “supposed to happen” at certain times.

• I should be married by 28
• I should own a home by 30
• I should have 2 kids by 35
• My 30s are my “earning years”
• I want to retire by 50

And on it goes. But all of those make false assumptions of how life should work that aren’t based in anything other than tradition and the expectations of others.

This isn’t to say that you should lazily meander through life. On the contrary, you need to set goals and pursue your dreams.

But, if you race through life always trying to get to the next level, you’re going to wake up one day and realize that it was all in vain and you won’t be able to get any of the time back. And that’s what you’ll get if you chase arbitrary, cultural targets.

Generally, our biggest regrets in life don’t come from doing things we shouldn’t have done. They come from not doing the things we know we should have.

Lesson #3: Never Settle

Too many people settle for a mediocre existence rather than pursue a meaningful life.

How do I know? Because the average American watches 4 hours of TV per day. If you’re settling for a life of mediocre existence, you will find ways to distract yourself from that awful feeling deep down inside of you that your life lacks true meaning and purpose. You will want to disconnect from the “real world.”

Instead of pursing our passions, we watch reality shows like American Idol and So You Think You Can Dance where we can sit on the sidelines of life and live vicariously through others who are doing what we’re afraid to.

If you only learn one thing before you turn 33, please learn this one: never settle. Never stop dreaming.

I’ve found my meaning through my faith, my family, my friends and my pursuit of my passion.

Share Your Lessons

If you could travel back in time, what lessons would you give to yourself?

There are a lot of people who talk about “one day” owning their own business. Yet, very few people actually end up even trying it. Why?

Usually it’s because they’ve chosen to believe one or more lies about starting a business. There are 7 common lies that people are telling themselves right now that will keep them from changing their dream of entrepreneurship into a set of goals they can accomplish.

Lie #1 – It’s Too Risky In Today’s Economy

Without a doubt, our current economic situation sucks. However, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t start a business. In fact, starting a business during an economic downturn may be one of the best things you can do.

Why?

• Your job is likely not as safe as you think it is. After all, layoffs increase during times of economic uncertainty. Right? Why not put yourself in the driver’s seat rather than depend on someone else for a paycheck?
• It will force you to prioritize your spending. If you can operate a profitable business in an economic downturn, you can do it during times of economic boom.
• Competition decreases during crappy economic times. It’s sad but true. A lot of companies go out of business in a downturn. Regardless of the reason, this creates opportunity for someone who is talented and willing to work hard to take on clients from failing companies.
• It’s cheaper to start a business during a downturn. With so many businesses going under right now, it’s a great time to pick up needed items at an auction or on Craigslist. You can also negotiate better deals with potential vendors right now.

Here’s a fun fact: roughly half of the Dow Jones 30 were started during a recession. Now may be a great time to start that business you’ve been talking about.

Lie #2 – I Don’t Have Enough Time

How was last night’s episode of Gossip Girl? How insane was that Yankees game? OMG…did you see the preview for the next episode of Glee?

• The average American watches nearly 4 hours of TV per day.
• 49% of Americans say they watch too much TV.
• 98% of households in the US have at least 1 TV.
• 34% have 2.

You have the time. You just have to claim it from the other distractions in your life. If TV isn’t the problem, you may be working too many hours for someone else doing something you hate. This was my problem for too many years. I made a lot of money doing work I didn’t enjoy so that I could buy stuff I didn’t need.

Lie #3 – I Can’t Afford To Quit My Job

Who said you have to quit your job to start a business? Most businesses are started during nights and weekends. Feel like you don’t have enough time on nights and weekends? See Lie #2 above.

Oftentimes, it’s not an income problem that people have – it’s a spending problem. Their cost of living has risen to – or more likely above- their income.

So how can you prepare for being able to quit your job? Here are some things you can do to get ready:

• Save up 6 months of living expenses in a money market account.
• Create a budget for both the business and your household. Figure out how much money your business will need to make in order for you to survive.
• Get out of debt and stay out of debt. It’s a lot easier to start a business if you don’t have to worry about creditors knocking down your door.
• Practice living on less before you have to start living on less. It’s a habit you have to learn. There is not magic “live within my means” pill.

Lie #4 – It Takes Too Much Money To Start a Business

There are a lot of businesses that can be started on less than $1,000, $5,000 or even $10,000 dollars. You just have to start thinking differently about how you’re going to do it.

First, start small and then scale up. You don’t need to go lease a storefront just because you want to own “the best hotdog joint in town.” Instead, start by renting a cart and setting up shop on a busy street in the financial district downtown. Try out different recipes while minimizing exposure. Figure out if people even like your hotdogs.

Then, if things are going well, begin planning for expansion into a bigger market. Figure out how much money it will take to purchase your own cart. Start saving to buy one without financing it. Once you own your own cart, begin socking money away to buy another cart (in cash) and hire an employee to run it. Keep up this process until you own enough carts that you’re making enough money to open your storefront without going into debt.

Too many people use borrowed money such as credit cards, home equity, and personal loans to finance the opening and/or growth of their business. This is stupid. Figure out how to start smaller with less exposure and risk. It will keep you making smarter decisions because you won’t be able to buy things you can’t afford.

Lie #5 – I Don’t Know Anything About Running a Business

Neither do a lot of people when they start a business and it shouldn’t stop you from starting one.

Don’t get me wrong – you need to learn about running a business. But there are a lot of free or low-cost resources available to you:

• Ask friends and family who have started a business to act as advisors and mentors.
• Contact SCORE. They offer free small business advice and mentoring in-person and online.
• Visit your local library and become and avid reader of business books.
• Find and read blogs on business development, sales, marketing, freelancing, etc.

If you’re starting small and part-time as I suggest, you’ll have time to learn about running a business as you do it. It will take a lot of the pressure off of having to know it all up-front.

Lie #6 – I’ll Go Out on My Own When …

…my kids are out of the house.
…I retire.
…I blah, blah, blah.

No. You most likely won’t. Excuses like these are generally made out of fear. Starting a business can be a frightening thought. So rather than admit the fear and confront it, people mask it behind “sensible” statements such as these. They tell themselves that it would be unwise to do it right now.

These statements meet two needs:

• We don’t want to admit we’re scared, so we tell ourselves and others that we’re going to do it…just…down the road. It keeps the dream alive – even if only on life support.
• It makes us sound reasonable in our fear. After all, who doesn’t want to sound reasonable? Nobody wants to be seen as rash or foolish. This type of excuse enables us to lie to ourselves and others while maintaining a bit of self-respect.

Lie #7 – I Don’t Know What Kind of Business to Start

I think that most people have an idea of what kind of business they would start, they just don’t want to admit it in any other capacity than as a fantasy.

What do I mean by that?

Have you ever played the game with friends where you answer the question “What would you do if money weren’t an object?” Of course. We’ve all done it. And it’s fun because it’s “safe.” It’s all fantasy because, of course, money is an object. So we talk about our fantasy of starting our own sports memorabilia store, wedding photography business, bakery, PR agency, non-profit, etc.

The problem is that when we relegate our passions to the world of fantasy, we no longer see them as potentially viable businesses. We assume that something we’re passionate about can’t possibly make money. It just seems too good to be true that we could actually do something we love and provide for our families.

If you know how to answer that question in a cocktail party setting, then you know what kind of business to start. Now, granted, the business may take on a different form than in your money-is-no-object fantasy. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take the above steps to make it happen.

Share Your Thoughts

Are any of these lies stopping you from starting a business?

If you’ve already started your business, which lie did you struggle with the most? Should I have added additional lies to the list?

I’d love to hear your experiences in the comments below.